In as many days I have had conversations with two homegirls who are negotiating the complications of no-strings-turned-tangled situations with could-be, should be, damn near would be lovers. Sex is serious business. Because while everybody should be able to get their physical needs met, there are other, more complicated and tangled needs wrapped up somewhere between tight thighs and restless bodies.
In her collection “The Love Space Demands (a continuing saga)” Ntozake Shange says, “Watching the women in my group suppress giggles, raise eyebrows, and wiggle in their seats, I realized that we all were having trouble separating love from sex, sensuality from affection, devotion from masochism, and independence from fear of intimacy.”
Uhm-hm.
She also says, “The ephiphany of orgasms or infatuations is a consistently sought after reward for leading an otherwise reasonable life.”
#Word!
My throwback (originally posted March 3, 2012) is a poetic tribute to all of the ways our (sexual and emotional) needs and wants struggle to get met at the same time.
no strings
i thought that i
could be brave enough
to make love to you
with
no
strings attached
but your arms around me felt like strings
your fingers, like strings
when you used them to massage my neck
and caress my back
and my legs
felt like strings
when i
held them around your neck
& squeezed and scratched your back
leaving marks that looked like strings
i thought
we could be happy together
laughing before, during, and after
wrapped up in damp sheets
and avoiding each other’s eyes so that we can pretend that it wasn’t that deep
all that touching and holding and moaning
we just did
because we are f’cking without strings
attached
but it felt like a string
pulling and luring me back to you
tying your hands above your head
torturing you with my eyes
because the strings would not allow me to look any other way
or place
as I straddled you and rode you to perfection
but it’s cool because
i never promised to love you
and you never promised to love me back
and i don’t need you to love me
i just want you to want me. . .back
but these strings in my heart
won’t let me
my pride
won’t let me
hold on to false strings
yet somehow i got attached
© R. Boylorn, 2012
emotions should be the precursor to sexuality, what do you think? 🙂
idk if its my pms or what but I just cried myself into a snot spasm. thank u.
Before salvation I did think as these women or men would think…no strings attached. Yet there are strings attached…Your body is a temple and when people step into your temple they leave handprints…So, please remember your body is more than organs, tissue, and bones. Its a spirtiual place that can have fingerprints left behind(attachments)…Love Sistah
Love the poem. Love it.
Completely dig that poem. It soo mirrors my life right now. Amazingly written. Love it
Wow. I have sat here and read and reread. Beautifully written and painfully true.
This poem was TOO raw…it left me absolutely breathless and reflective, because it brought me back to a place I didn’t want to remember. And that’s the power of amazing writing.
That poem was so DEEP, and so true! So glad you use your gift of writing to bless others!!1
Bravo!! Wish I could like it multiple times..